So my weight is 210 pounds, yes you read that right. Don't cry for me! I put it there!!
In 100 days I will strive really hard to lose 60 pounds. That gives me until April 13th.
And as I have mentioned, I have put a plea out there. I will let you go back and look at it!
I will say that humble prayer, and asking for help has made such a difference today. I have felt my burden lifted. I have felt the strength and courage boost me up. And I am grateful . Change is scary, I think we fear losing ourselves, and what we realize is that it is through improving ourselves we really find what we knew was there all along. This battle I am waging is one I look forward to learning from.
There is a part of me that says,
"You should be embarrassed. Here you are admitting to the world that you are a failure, you couldn't complete this the first time around, what makes you think you can now?"
In my heart is a different story. In my heart I am humbled, grateful for the opportunity to overcome my weakness. Grateful for Mercy, and Patience. I am also grateful for the opportunity I have to grow more. I look at this challenge, although similar in many aspects, completely different than before. I see new challenges, and hills to climb. I look at it differently than I did before. It is hard to describe. In some ways it is like the glass half full or empty. Sometimes when you look at anything long enough it changes. This time around it isn't about me, in a sense but more about education and putting scripture to test.
If you read in Doctrine and Covenants 89, you will find the Word of Wisdom. There are promises to following the it. I desire to see and partake of those promises. But I also want to learn. You see old habits die hard! The saying is true, and I have don't like ventured past my comfort zone. I need to learn and gain new tools to utilize. I want to see how my mind, body, and outlook on life change from what I eat.
I know that there are many foods out there that are addictive. And I am willing to admit that I am an addict to those foods. That is why I am seeking to gain the education. What may taste good, may be just a figment of my imagination.
Well here is to today!!
1 comment:
Steph, I just found your blog today and my heart has been touched because you have been so honest and humble in writing all this. You're brave to open up and I admire you! You are an example to me and I feel encouraged and motivated to try a little harder in the areas that are such a challenge to me. Thank you.
Post a Comment